Monday, November 16, 2020

Week 2 - Getting Serious

 Week 2

Well the journey continues to be a mix of mental and physical play.  This week Madam Apollonia continued to give me very explicit direction on things she wanted.  I had several of days of doing workouts at Her request and of course the other training was on keeping the house.  I cleaned the house nearly every day, did all the laundry and all the vacuuming.  I felt proud of the work that I had done and Madam Apollonia seemed very appreciative as well.

In addition to the assigned chores I was asked to do several special favors. 

  • Getting lunch and bringing it to her at work
  • Running errands
  • Doing the shopping and bringing Her dinner
  • Finding some cock cages for Her to look at

The bigger deal however this week was the sexual training.  She has taken control of all my ejaculations.  There was not one time this week that I came without Her direct control and even more importantly with out Her telling me the moment when I was to release.  In all of these cases She has held onto my scrotum and cock afterwards to assert her control and to make me cringe as I’m always sensitive after the release.

Is it December 31st?

At the end of the week as my commitment to this incarnation of our relationship waned, I started asking if the “try this out time” was over.  Madam Apollonia would have none of it.  Over, over and over She reasserted we were in this for the full two months.  I met this at various points with different emotions.  Sometime I had the giddy butterfly feeling that comes when I know She is enjoying our current state.  Other times I was downright belligerent at one point wrestling with her and even pinching her nipples very hard.  By the end of the week She had me back in the right headspace….and there was some punishment for my actions.

Sexual domination

On Saturday Madam Apollonia began “reprogramming” me.  She chose to do this in the shower, one of the two places where She has the most outright control.  I was asked to bring two of the dildos into the shower.  As She bent me over a bench with my hands and knees on the floor. She proceeded to place the large dildo in my mouth.  “I want all of your holes full.  You need to know who is control”. Then after lubricating me - fully - with her fingers, She began to impale my ass with the anatomically accurate dildo.  I couldn’t take it.  She pressed on, not aggressively, but persistently.  With sheer will alone She managed to claim my ass and then proceeded to use Her knee to repeatedly impale me on the dildo.  Once I had reached my point of delusion She released me from her sexual control and began to shave my ass and scrotum.  I literally melted away as she took control.  I will admit a few hours later I was waffling again.  The next day she would close that door.  During the shower She had me bring the same dildo into the shower.  This time She again impaled me and used Her knee to drive home the dildo and Her control.  Ultimately She had moved me again to the delusional state.  She ultimately helped me off the floor and onto a bench.  There She set me up with the dildo deep into me.  She just held me while I felt overwhelmed.  It didn’t end there.  After the shower She directed me into bed.  For the first time She brought the dildo to bed and impaled me again.  As She spooned me from behind, reached around and held my cock and balls. She held me in place and asked me to take a nap.  As if anyone in the world could sleep with their Mistress pegging them over and over again.  During this time She whispered in my ear.  I can’t possibly remember everything She said as I was hormonally high as a kite.  She told me that she thinks I would like to actually take this relationship to the point where I am nothing but a slave.  She talked about getting me a tail and having me be truly owned by Madam Apollonia.  She also talked about feminizing me even more.  She referred to my ass as her pussy.  Most every day She gives me a pair of girls panties to wear and I wonder what else She wants to do to me. She talked about putting me in high heels and dressing me in an apron.  I’m nervously excited to exploring Her desires.  She informed me that that evening She would use her strapless dildo to take my "virginity".  Quite frankly like being drunk  -when She was done I was not fit to do anything.  I went out and started dinner, but even boiling water was a struggle.  That night did not go exactly as planned for family reasons, but She was able to milk me.  Even a day later I don’t question our status.  I just want to please Her and I want Her to take my virginity while She masturbates herself on the strapless dildo.

Sunday, November 8, 2020

Day 3-5

Day 3-5

The last "work" day of the week.

Since the beginning of covid-19 our work life has been dramatically impacted.  As we stand today my wife works almost every day out of the house while Madam Apollonia's boy has been working mostly from home.  It is hard to tell how this arrangement has impacted the beginning of this journey, but for the most part Madam Apollonia has not been providing much if any household direction.  That changed starting Day 3.  Before she got out of bed, while I was working on her coffee, I returned to the room.  She pulled back the covers for me to lay down next to her.  I probably overreached but as I saw her pussy there I could not help but dive in.  I went after he clit aggressively and after a couple of minutes she came.  As she had before I was asked to mark myself with her scent.  When I was done I finished her latte, she told me that in addition to the laundry we had discussed she wanted me to bring her some lunch at work and I needed to do some weight lifting today.  I worked on my laundry chores that morning and ran out at lunch took care of the grocery shopping and then picked up one of my wife's preferred lunches.  I drove them to her work and waited till she was free to give her the lunch.  I finished doing the rest of my chores and that night we had another shower.  Once again she spent time scrubbing me, this is something that would take special meaning the next night, and she spent time asserting her dominance over me.  To say these are some of the best times would be a vast understatement.

 

New rules:

  • No shorts in bed whatsoever, no boxers
  • Instructed me how to kiss her when she comes home

 

Drive through the country

The next day was filled with driving.  This was a great opportunity for us to talk.  I have posted before about the various level of an FLR.  She wanted to clarify her thinking's on this topic.  She discussed FLR, WLM (Wife Led Marriage), D/s (F,m) relationship.  All kinds of people had all kinds of "levels" that have unique meanings to them.  We weren't going to fit into any of those fixed bucket, but we would go our own way.  She said that we are living TTWD (That Thing We Do) - and boy are we.  We had great conversations about what was working and what we would do.  That night while driving to dinner Madam Apollonia asked me to listen to an erotic story on audible.  After dinner while she was getting ready I was walking and she asked me to continue to listen to the story.  The part of story I listened to focused on sexual slavery and in particular about men who were treated as ponies and had to constantly be bound to a harness through a tailed butt plug.  After finishing the story she asked me to join her in bed.  She had put on a strapless dildo into her pussy.  She asked me to suck her cock.  As I did what she told me, she began doing to things that can make me quiver.  She started telling me I was a good girl as worked her cock.  She kept shoving my head on causing me to gag and ultimately she made herself cum.  She asked me about the story I had listened to.  She asked me about what they did to the male slaves.  I thought back to the shower she had given me the night before.  I thought about all the times she had washed me.  Then she prepared me for the last part of the story.  The training from the story involved putting the tail in the new pony.  While she talked about getting me a tail at this point it was about training me to get ready.  Earlier in the day she had me find all the butt plugs we have had.  I even included an old dildo from a strap on.  That's when she went to work.  She was being delightfully Dominant.  Over the next 15 minutes she worked her way through all of them.  Starting with the small one that was frankly not much bigger around than my thumb.  At number five we were at the old strap on.  I would call it anatomically correct for an small to average erect man.  I was amazed how she worked her way up to my complete submission.  When she took the last one out I felt a certain amount of pride that I had taken what she wanted to give me.  Then as I was getting ready she put her hand back down on my back to gently guide me back into the position.  I must admit I wasn't sure what she was going to do.  Then with a sudden surge of stress I knew what she was doing.  She still had her strapless dildo on.  This was not like the old one.  This is the dildo that a few minutes ago was deep in my throat.  This is the one that I would call anatomically exceptional (Nothing like the elephant dildos you can see on the internet).  It is long and bigger around than a normal cock.  She worked and worked to pierce me with this extension of her body.  She rocked me back on it till I truly cried out. 

After cleaning myself off Madam Apollonia decided it was time to drain me as my balls seemed to have doubled in size.  She quickly mounted me and as we discussed some of the FLR material I had read she truly sucked the life out of me.

New rules:

 

  • I need to keep a hand on her when we are in public.  Holding hands or small of the back…..

 

 

Return Home

During the drive home we just continued to discuss what we had done and listened more to the erotic story.  We had to make a stop at the store.  While we were there she had me pick out some new underwear.  I told her I had no idea what size I would wear in the women's section.  She gave me a size and asked me to pick them out.  Over the last 5 days I have worn her underwear several times.  I guess I'll find out what she has in mind in the next couple of days.  That night we returned home and took another shower.  Once again my mind returned to the ponies of the book as Madam cleaned me inside and out.  After the shower she wanted to take a nap while I was going to run errands and get some take out for dinner.  After the shower and as I was getting ready Madam Apollonia decided to use her small vibrator to cum.  As I was preparing to leave she once again instructed me to kiss and lick and play with her clitoris.  After asking me about how she felt on my tongue she asked me to once again mark myself by rubbing my face in her wet joy.  Later that night I felt a personal victory as I did hop into bed clothed exactly the way she wants.

 

Key Learning

  • Topping from the bottom:  I still have a gap here.  Frankly a term that my wife knows well, but a term of which I have never heard.  Now that I understand - I'm working hard not to assert my desires on Madam Apollonia from role in our relationship.  I know I have a lot to learn on this topic.

 

Thursday, November 5, 2020

Day 2

Day 2

 

It was another amazing day in the journey.  Last night Madam Apollonia(the name she selected) not only selected our names, but also set up a blog for me to chronicle our journey.  I'm now Madam Apollonia's boy. 

 

We had lots of good conversations yesterday.  I'm working hard to understand what being truly submissive means.  In the past we had nights of submission and even once had a month where any sexual fantasy play was with Madam Apollonia being dominant.  While I absolutely enjoyed these activities, Madam Apollonia would be the first to say that I frequently would be only partially committed.  It was not uncommon in the middle of sub play for me to flip from sub to Dom as my testosterone built.  At times a literally could not control myself.  My wife was understanding, but at times this sort of flip flop was at the very least annoying and sometimes aggravating.  In response I have tried to go longer periods with consistent sub/Dom roles.

 

Key direction from Madam Apollonia yesterday

 

  • She is not going to over feminize me.  When she has turned me into a pile of mush she sometime calls me her little girl.  Or she'll tell me that I've been a good girl.  Every day this week she has given me a pair of panties to wear.  I think we will continue to dabble and I look forward to seeing where she wants me to go.
  • She may ask me to flip to provide some fantasy relief for her.  She told me that she may want to spend some time as a sub.  She derives glorious relief at times when she is in "sub space".  I will gladly take on that mantle and I look forward to seeing how that affects me on this journey.
  • Told me that we were going to do this till the end of the year.  We had discussed trying this out in the month of November.  Yesterday while reviewing the post that I wrote she texted me to inform me that we were going to do this until 12/31.  To say that I had butterflies is a gross understatement.  I'm currently cherishing her taking more and more control.  I'm sure there will be a wall and I'm nervous / excited about finding a new boundary.
  • Asked me to do the laundry.  Last night she asked me to do laundry today.  I'm quick to admit that it was exciting, but I was hoping she would tell me to do it.  We are both good communicators (ok… I'm a guy I'm ok she is really good).  I candidly told her that I wish she had told me to do it.  As she held me she told me that she was going to be a "bitch".  And then she said to me -  have I ever asked you to do the laundry.  Basically no.  She was asserting herself and her desires but doing with affection.  For people who are looking for a level 3 or level 4 FLR this probably sounds underwhelming.  For me it just created a safe space to know she wants to be dominant but not bitchy. 
  • Wash me.  When we were getting ready for bed Madam Apollonia told me that she was going to take a shower as well.  When we got in the shower together she just held me and kissed me.  After several minutes she asked me to wash her body.  She had already put conditioner in her hair.  I proceeded to wash her body head to toe and then brought her to orgasm.  At the end she bent over and asked me to penetrate her.  It was an amazing cap to an intense emotional day.

 

My first obvious blunder.

I really plan on writing each day about the prior day, but I made one mistake this morning.  After I got up to make Madam Apollonia's coffee I quickly returned while it was steaming.  She asked me to hop back in bed for a minute.  I gladly did and took some initiative and performed oral sex on Madam.  At the end she asked me to rub my face all over her juices.  She wanted me to smell her throughout the day.  I gladly did exactly what she asked.  That's when my perpetual need to validation arose.  I asked if I could ask something.  She at first said no, but then came back and said go ahead and ask.  I said "can you tell me we are in a female led relationship".  For me this is psychological issue I have with needing validation.  "Do you like me do you really like me?"  As is well documented above she has done NOTHING but show me her commitment to this.  She asked me "Did I not spend last night setting up the blog…."  I felt bad.  Not only had I let my insecurity get the best of me, not only had I tried to make part of that moment about me, but I had ruined a great moment.  

Wednesday, November 4, 2020

The Beginning

My Love/Wife and I have been together for decades.  Over this time our sexual relationship has always been vibrant.  In no small part, this is based on the strong libido of my wife.  If you ever doubt this is a phenomenal gift let me assure you it is.  As I read many of the blogs I see people who use non-Vanilla experiences to drive interest in their love life.  That is not how we have approached the kink in our life, instead we treated it more like wearing new clothes.  You just feel special and better wearing them.  

So why am I here?  Recently I opened a door with my wife about FLR (Female Led Relationships).  She is well-read in kink and although she was not familiar with the term she was very familiar with the concept.  This is just starting to unfold, but the more I read the more I realize that this will not be a tectonic shift we have already drifted toward many of the attributes of an FLR.  

  • I do most of the laundry
  • I prepare most of the food and do the majority of the food shopping
  • I make coffee every day before work for her
  • I do the majority of vacuuming
  • I make the bed
  • She has almost always managed our checking account
  • She makes many of the decisions about gifts/donations
  • She loves shopping at hardware stores - :)
  • She was raised to be in charge and fully capable

While this list seems well-aligned to an FLR lifestyle there are gaps.  My wife likes to be submissive.  She is also a masochist (but likes sadism a bit too).  She likes to take care of me.


So we started November off trying something new.  I wouldn't call it a full commitment to a lifestyle change, but IT IS DEFINITELY NOT a night of flipping to me be a sub.  It gives me quivers just thinking about it, but she has:

  • Given me girls underwear to wear
  • Shaved my cock and balls bare
  • Put my cock and balls in bondage
  • Allowed me to buy a cock cage
  • Flogged me all over and at times with great zeal
  • Pegged me in the shower
  • Ordered me to cum
  • Made me feel owned/loved/cared for
  • Instructed me there will be rules.  Rule 1 only wear underwear she provides or none at all
  • She asked me to blog about my experience
  • She has asked me for a list of names for her and me

So what's next.  I'm waiting to hear what she wants.  In reading a lot of great blogs I realized I have dictated too much.  I would really like to let go and see where she is willing to take this.  It sounds like she wants to take at least some time this month and explore/play with these new roles.  She has been exploring how to assert some of this role change through clothing.  She has talked about taking me shopping for undergarments for me to wear.  Something that she knows will make me think of her all the time.  I fully admit that makes me a bit giddy.....


More to come.

Welcome

 Welcome to my blog, though I will not be posting here regularly.  


My husband and I have been together for....forever.  We've been switches from day one.  We spent many years with Him as my Dom and me very submissive.  I had a blog, SirQsMLB.  We've decided to switch things up a bit - all puns intended.  To that end, this will be his blog.  

Welcome to Madam Appolonia Switched On!

-MadApp

Fantasy: It was Friday the 11th.  MadApollonia was sleeping in while I finished working.  After all of my meetings I brought her in a latte ...